One Two One: Bathhouse? There's a Ghost!

Ten days later.
In front of Mount Zhenze.

Cui Jue had once said that time-travelers had a very, very low probability of obtaining a cheat ability, and that the so-called first time-traveler, Wei Lai, happened to possess one.

And although that Wei Lai was long gone, his bathhouse still remained in this era, currently managed by his descendants. That bathhouse possessed the miraculous power to cure all ailments. Regarding such crucial information, Ming Tian only wanted to say one thing to Cui Jue...
Eat your fucking spiraling shit!

What on earth was this? Was this a fantasy novel? A bathhouse that cured all ailments—you might as well tell me that bathhouse offered a hundred girls giving free full-body massages, and that would still be more believable than this load of crap.
And what about the leader of the wonton-anal-fissure faction who could take on five thousand by himself? Are you Ip Man's master, Ip Da?

Cui Jue, I finally managed to think of you as somewhat reliable, but it turns out you and your people are all suffering from eighth-grade syndrome.
Suffering from chuni was one thing, but did you have to cut corners on me, too?
Ming Tian truly suffered immensely at Cui Jue's hands this time.

"Damn it! I knew that bastard Cui Jue wouldn't give me anything good!"
Ming Tian stood there with his hands on his hips, his face turning sallow with anger.

The horse lay on the ground, panting heavily, its eyes bloodshot—clearly on the verge of dying from illness.
What kind of ghost joke was this? They gave him a carriage, but the horse was a sick animal? It was about to drop dead after just ten days of travel?
They were still one hundred kilometers away from Sumen Town; how were they supposed to cover the rest of the way? By the number eleven bus?

What were they supposed to do without a horse out here in the middle of nowhere? Spring had already arrived! Qingming Festival had already passed! If you casually kicked a clump of grass, the mosquitoes that flew out would be numerous enough to stew a bowl of high-grade mosquito broth!
The nearest place, Wujun, was still twenty kilometers away! He had never run a marathon in his life, so what the hell were they supposed to do?

"Damn it!"
Furious, Ming Tian kicked the horse's butt.

"Whoa!"
Startled by the pain, the sick horse let out a long whinny and kicked out its hind legs in a struggle.
Thud. The hoof struck Ming Tian right in the crotch.

"Ah, my little bird!!"
How powerful is a horse's hind kick? I believe there is no idiot in this world willing to find out from personal experience.
With a sharp, piercing shriek, Ming Tian clutched his groin and flew seven or eight meters away on the spot.

"Brother Ming Tian!" At this, An Luo panicked. Wouldn't a kick from a horse's hind leg result in castration plus half-body paralysis?
Seeing this, Xiao Xinzhu grew so anxious that even her armor rattled.
Yin Chan suppressed her smile and remained motionless.

Ming Tian, lying on the ground, had a face turned completely purple—not from the pain, but from sheer terror!
Damn it, you're about to die and you're still kicking this hard?!

Looking down, he saw that his ten-layered crotch guard had been completely dented inward. Because that little brat Mo Wang frequently managed to slash at his crotch, Ming Tian hadn't taken off the protective guard to this day. Never had he expected it to actually come in handy.
Good grief, this was a ten-layer crotch guard! If he hadn't been wearing it when he took that kick, wouldn't his testicles have been shattered even if he had a hundred of them?

"Someone cut off that horse's balls right now!!! I'm eating horsewhip tonight to nourish myself!"
"You mustn't, Brother Ming Tian! Eating the whip of a sick horse will cause your yang to shrink!"
"What the hell, An Luo, you know so much about this? Fine, you eat it!!"
"Ah?? Why?"
"Because you look like a horsewhip."

A small, slightly tedious interlude—to sum it up, the horse was dead, and the carriage was ruined. Although exhausting, the four of them had no choice but to pack their belongings and prepare to head toward Wujun on foot.

Fortunately, Cui Jue had a reliable side; at least the money he gave wasn't counterfeit.
Well, it wasn't counterfeit... Ninety taels of silver, weighing forty catties, plus ten strings of copper coins. Yes, exactly ten strings of copper coins.
May I ask why you couldn't just hand me a hundred taels of silver directly? Why are you just like my old man, fond of giving out copper coins?!
Ten strings, ten thousand copper coins!! Do you have any idea what concept that is? If we string them up with ropes, each of us could wear a coat made entirely of money. Why give me so many copper coins? To catch zombies?

Could you show some consideration for me? I'm currently a disabled person!!
Do you take me for a donkey?!!

Fortunately, there was An Luo, this human-shaped excavator; otherwise, wouldn't I have been worked to death?
By the way, An Luo, I've noticed you've become even more of a freak since your resurrection. Your luggage and bundles weigh a hundred and twenty catties in total, yet you aren't even panting? If you had been born in the modern era, the principal of Lanxiang Technical School would be smiling from ear to ear!

Just like that, they trudged along the path. The mosquitoes in the sky followed them like stalkers the entire way. Within two kilometers, Ming Tian was already panting heavily from exhaustion.
I'm done for, I'm going to be worked to death. Which brain cell of mine misfired back then to make me abandon a great cause... I'm exhausted, I'm truly about to die. Is there a morgue nearby? I'd like to apply for a membership card!

Not just Ming Tian, but the rest of the party carrying all those bundles—except for An Luo, that abnormal freak—all showed signs of utter exhaustion.
Especially Xinzhu, sealed tightly inside her armor, whose panting sounded as heavy as Darth Vader's respirator.

"Hey! Ming Tian." Right as Ming Tian was about to collapse, Yin Chan suddenly spoke up.
"What?" Exhausted to the limit and watching dusk approach, Ming Tian replied feebly.

Looking back, Yin Chan didn't answer. She merely pointed a finger to the right, her pretty eyes vacant with an expression as if she had just seen a ghost.
Following the direction of her finger, Ming Tian, Xinzhu, and even An Luo stared in utter shock!

A bathhouse!
That's right, out in the desolate wilderness, a bathhouse had materialized out of thin air?
When they had walked past that exact spot just a moment ago, Ming Tian had seen nothing there. This bathhouse seemed to have teleported directly into place.

"What the hell, is this place haunted?!" Ming Tian's heart skipped a beat.
This... for a bathhouse to pop up out of nowhere was far too spine-chilling, wasn't it? Like a village corpse in the wilderness? Were they shooting a horror movie?

The exterior of the bathhouse looked like a brick building, though red bricks hadn't been invented yet in this era. The roof was thatched with straw, but the front gates were quite luxurious, crafted from rosewood.
On the curtains hanging on either side of the door, two long blue cloths were displayed, bearing the large characters [Hot Spring], naturally accompanied by a Japanese-style hot spring symbol.
It was just that the symbol was drawn so terribly it looked more like two bowls of ramen.

Wisps of smoke curled lazily from the rooftop chimney, presenting the quintessential air of a resort getaway.
Hey, hey, hey, this is reality, you second-rate god, don't tell me you really crossed over and brought some bizarre things into this world. I'm timid, so don't scare me.

Just as Ming Tian felt a chill run down his spine, he noticed that the plaque above the door was inscribed with four faded characters that were almost illegible.
Wei Lai Bathhouse!

Wei Lai was the first time-traveler. At the foot of the eastern side of Mount Zhenze, there was his bathhouse. Wei Lai was gone, but the bathhouse—his cheat ability—remained, and it was now managed by his descendants.
Cui Jue's words echoed in his mind once again.

Ming Tian was secretly startled.
Could what Cui Jue said be true? Did the first time-traveler really possess a cheat ability? Was this bathhouse truly Wei Lai's legacy?

After pondering for a long time, he looked back at his team. Everyone wore expressions of profound fatigue. Well, everyone... An Luo wasn't quite human, at least not in Ming Tian's eyes.
A hot spring?
If they could rest at a hot spring for the night, it would benefit everyone's spirits and physical strength. Besides, bathhouses didn't exist in this era, and Ming Tian had never experienced a truly comfortable bath. This hot spring held an irresistible temptation for him.

However, was it safe?
With this doubt in mind, Ming Tian deliberated for a long time before finally making a decision.
If they continued to push on like this, even if they didn't drop dead from exhaustion, they would be crippled for days by the time they reached Wujun. With Pan Yu'er currently in power, public morals were bound to deteriorate daily. If they encountered any danger, they would likely be unable to handle it.

Weighed against that, the danger level of this bathhouse was actually lower, because Cui Jue had said that those harboring hostility could not find this bathhouse.
"Everyone, let's go inside and take a look?" Picking up his bundles, Ming Tian dragged his weary body and made the decision for the team.

........................
PS: Alright, there's only one chapter today; no second chapter.
Because today is the license plate auction day.
Regular readers definitely know this, but just to be safe, I'll explain it to the new readers.
The so-called auction day is the third Saturday of every month. If there are fewer than 20 working days between it and the third Saturday of the previous month, it gets postponed to the fourth Saturday. There is only one auction day per month, and the update volume on that day is always relatively small—this is a standing tradition of the book, happening only once a month. Naturally, on this day, as the head of the third branch, Xiao Wan will be up to his ears in work and won't have any time to write.
This should be the third auction day for this book.
Xiao Wan makes a living relying on this license plate auction, so he is only busy on this one day each month. Please understand, everyone.
We will resume two chapters tomorrow.