Chapter 26: The Adventures of Zhang the Cur

Chapter Twenty-Six: The Adventures of Zhang Doggy

To make a girl fall in love with you is, of course, quite difficult. It requires a rather high set of standards, as the ancients once said—handsome, rich, and talented—or as modern people would say, tall, wealthy, and good-looking. But to make a girl dislike you is much easier. If you're a loser, even if you do nothing, they'll still hate you. In this respect, Shi Bai hardly needed to try at all; after a moment’s thought, he knew exactly what to do.

After school, Shi Bai didn’t go off to play games. Instead, he hurried back to the hotel, intent on inspecting his employees’ work before they finished for the day.

He rushed upstairs and entered the meeting room. As expected, all the staff were present. Shi Bai straightened his clothes and walked in slowly.

“How’s the art style design coming along? Let me see.”

Zhang Hammer quickly opened his laptop with a cheerful smile. “Boss Shi, look. According to your instructions, we’ve made all the characters look like those meme faces.”

Shi Bai glanced at the screen and saw a comical panda face, carrying a husky on its back, fiercely throwing punches. Though the artwork was rough, the movement was surprisingly well-captured—there was something amusing about it.

“You fools!” Shi Bai slammed the table. “Wonderful! Absolutely wonderful!”

“Huh?” The staff looked miserable. “Boss, you really think this is good?”

“Of course!” Shi Bai said. “Look at this head—turning it into a panda is absurd, but it’s got a cute, unexpected charm. And this dog, despite its sly expression, is still adorable! So…”

He quickly grabbed paper and a pen, scribbling away. “Make the protagonist an old man named Ding, and turn the dog into a pig.”

Everyone was startled. “Didn’t you say dog? How is it now a pig?!”

Shi Bai smiled indifferently. “It’s to annoy the readers, obviously! A dog that looks like a pig—just imagine how irritating that must be.”

The staff nearly fainted. Liu Fortune, who handled the plumbing, said, “I feel as though my intelligence is being insulted.”

“Well said!” Unexpectedly, Shi Bai applauded enthusiastically. “Fortune, you really are a lucky charm! What we want is to insult the readers’ intelligence, so that everyone despises and rejects us, and no one will read our comic, ultimately leading us to bankruptcy!”

“Huh?!”

The staff were dumbfounded. “Bankruptcy?”

Shi Bai quickly coughed, covering up his slip. “Anyway, you don’t understand. Just do as I say.”

The employees had no choice but to crowd around and look at Shi Bai’s drawing. Sure enough, the image of Old Ding appeared—eyes like zeros, ears shaped like threes, a mouth like a four, and three strands of silly hair atop his head. It was as awkward as could be.

As for the dog, well, it really did look like a pig with a fat head and big ears, though the drawing skills wouldn’t even match a kindergarten child.

Seeing the dejected expressions of the staff, Shi Bai nodded with satisfaction. “Hmm, looks like we’ve achieved the effect. Good! Tomorrow, use this style and turn it into a full comic. Then I’ll send it to the website!”

The employees could only nod helplessly. After all, whether the comic made money was none of their concern, so long as the boss paid their wages.

The next day passed swiftly. Thanks to the staff’s hard work, the first installment of the ridiculous comic was completed.

Why so fast? Because the plot consisted of only three sentences.

The protagonist, Zhang Doggy, lost his parents as a child and was raised by a dog that looked like a pig.

The dog taught him dog boxing and raised him to adulthood.

The dog told him to venture out into the world, but Zhang Doggy refused. The dog replied, “If you don’t want to go, then we won’t.”

That was the entirety of the first installment.

Shi Bai returned and saw the bizarre style and strange plot. He was overjoyed.

“Beautiful! This is my very first comic!”

The employees shook their heads privately. “It’s yours, not ours. I’d never claim this as my work, not even under threat.”

“Good!” Shi Bai quickly told Zhang Hammer, “Contact LoveLove Animation website right now. Get them to publish our comic and make sure it’s featured on the homepage. Money is no object!”

Zhang Hammer readily agreed. Since Shi Bai was footing the bill, he had no reason to refuse.

He uploaded the work to LoveLove Animation, naming it The Adventures of Zhang Doggy as Shi Bai requested, and then dialed the editor’s number.

“Hello, yes, we want our company’s work featured on the homepage… Oh? You want to review it first? Fine.”

The staff grew anxious as they waited. Would the website accept? Or would they curse them out?

“If it were me, I’d probably tear it up, spit on it, and yell, ‘Get lost!’” Zhang Hammer thought.

“If it were me, I’d just hang up,” Liu Little Swallow mused. “They’d think it was some kind of prank.”

Sure enough, after a while, a mocking voice came through the phone.

“Heh, sir, are you here to amuse us? We’re busy and don’t have time for these silly games!”

“Wait!” Shi Bai grabbed the phone. “We’re not joking!”

The other side paused. Shi Bai continued, “We’ll pay! We want a paid feature—put us on the homepage for a week, and I’ll give you 150,000!”

The room was silent.

“You’re serious?”

“Is this for real? Will he really pay?”

This was 150,000!

In this era, 150,000 wasn’t the same as in 2020. With inflation, it was equivalent to 400,000 in 2020. Most people couldn’t make money from their comics at all, much less pay a 150,000 feature fee.

So when Shi Bai said this, everyone inside and outside the room was stunned.

“Are you serious?” The voice on the other end was suspicious.

Shi Bai replied, “Absolutely. Want me to send the money right now?”

The employees were bewildered. “Just like that? No contract? What if they don’t keep their word?”

But Shi Bai didn’t seem to care. He said, “Give me your bank account number, and I’ll transfer it now!”

The other side hesitated, then recited the bank account number. Shi Bai wrote it down, turned around, and transferred 150,000 using the POS machine.

The employees were astonished. The editor at LoveLove Animation was equally shocked.

“There really are madmen in the world!”

“Um… well…” The editor’s voice was a bit tense. “I’ve discussed it with our manager, and he agreed. However, the homepage feature is currently occupied, and the time isn’t up yet. If you want your work featured, you’ll have to wait until this round ends, so it’ll be next Monday.”

“No problem!” Shi Bai agreed immediately. There were four days until next Monday, and three weeks left in the month-long task, so he wasn’t anxious.

“Alright, we’ll feature it next Monday.”

“Good, goodbye.” Shi Bai hung up and clenched his fist. “Yes!”

The employees quickly applauded. “Congratulations, Boss Shi, your first comic is going to be featured!”

Shi Bai joined in, applauding with them. “Don’t just congratulate me—you all contributed! This comic is a team effort.”

The staff felt both helpless and amused. No, no, this was all you.

“Alright! Everyone, go home for today. Tomorrow, brainstorm the second installment of The Adventures of Zhang Doggy.”

The applause stopped abruptly. The employees’ faces were full of despair. “Do we really have to make a second installment?”

“Of course!” Shi Bai said, surprised. “Did you think I was joking?”